Accident Humor

The following are actual statements found on insurance forms where car drivers attempted to summarize the details of an accident in the fewest words possible.

1. The Telephone pole was approaching. I was attempting to swerve out of its way when it struck the front end.

2. I was on my way to the doctor with rear end trouble when my universal joint gave way causing me to have an accident.

3. Coming home I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't have.

4. The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him.

5. In an attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.

6. I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law and headed over the embankment.

7. An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished.

8. The pedestrian had no idea which direction to run, so I ran over him.

9. I had been driving for 40 years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had an accident.

10. I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way.

11. The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its intentions.

12. My car was legally parked as it backed into the other car.